When times get hard for most of us, we go through an array of emotions and experience “stinking-thinking” for countless days about almost everything imaginable. But what about successful and resilient people? Surely they suffer defeats too but how do they cope? Here are several things they may do:
- They know their boundaries.
- They keep good company
- They cultivate self-awareness.
- They practice acceptance.
- They’re willing to sit in silence.
- They don’t have to have all the answers.
- They have a menu of self-care habits.
- They enlist their team.
- They consider the possibilities.
- They get out of their head.
Want to learn more? Check out The Art of Resilience.
“In order to make progress, three things are necessary–a thought, a feeling, and an action. They form a pyramid. If we have a thought and a feeling, but no action, we’re just spinning our wheels. If the thoughts and feelings are negative, this combination usually becomes worry, depression, and frustration. If the thoughts and feelings are positive, it’s often just unproductive “positive thinking.” A physical action is required to make the thought and feeling tangible. If we have a thought and an action but no feeling, the action will probably not continue for long. Our feelings are our greatest motivators. For sustained physical action, we need to feel something about what we’re doing. If we have a feeling and an action, but no directed thoughts, we’re like a powerboat without a rudder. There’s no logical, rational direction. This happens a lot with addictive behaviors–drug abuse, alcoholism, compulsive sex. The emotions say, “I want it.” And the body says, “You got it,” before the mind can even engage. Later, the mind may say, “You know you shouldn’t have done that.” We knew, but we “forgot.” Temporary insanity. If any one of the three sides of the pyramid is missing, the structure collapses. We cannot do productive work. We cannot accomplish what we want to accomplish. Knowing this, I offer the following advice: if you don’t have a matching thought, feeling, and action all available at the same time, release yourself from whichever ones you do have.” (Peter McWilliams)